I am depressed. This hasn’t been a very good week… actually, it hasn’t been a very good past couple of months. I was never feeling great about the wedding, but I had basically fixated all of my negative feelings that I was having in general on my wedding and/or my weight. Even my weight I lumped into the wedding category though, because I told myself that if it weren’t for the wedding I could be happy with the progress I’d made since there wouldn’t have been such a definite deadline. But, now the wedding is over and I’m left realizing that my bad feelings weren’t really about the wedding, they’re something much more and something I can’t seem to shake on my own.
I don’t know what is going on in my own head, but I know I’m unhappy. I have had several unfortunate incidents happen since my wedding. First Rob and I discovered that at least 4 cards were stolen from our wedding containing over $500 in gifts. Then about 2 weeks later, our garage was broken into by some drugged out jerk who broke my car window to steal my GPS. He also took Rob’s MP3 player and a few other random things. That cost us another $300ish. Then exactly 2 weeks after that incident, when we were driving home Rob and I were hit by a drunk driver. The drunk never even slowed down but left my car with about $2000 in damage. We have a $1000 deductible on our insurance company, so that left me with another $1000 in expenses and yet another situation in which I have no way of suing or anything to recoup our losses. It’s been frustrating, to say the least.
But, unfortunately, I just haven’t really been able to get over all of the crap that has happened. Read the rest of this entry »
I haven’t posted in awhile again, but I am still alive! If you look at my weight calendar at all, you can see that even when I’m not posting entries, I keep that up to date. I know a lot of diet and weight loss gurus advise against weighing yourself everyday, but I really think it helps keep me on track. Plus, my weight really just doesn’t fluctuate as much as it used to. When I first started losing weight and before I kept that calendar, I was going crazy because I would lose or gain as much as 4 pounds overnight. I’m much more consistent now.
I’ve been “following” the Body for Life program for 4 weeks now. I use the term following loosely though. Since our kitchen has been a disaster area for basically the entire time I have been doing BFL, it has been impossible to cook healthy dinners. Rob and I have eaten nothing but junk for dinner for weeks. So I haven’t followed the diet portion at all. I’ve partially followed the exercise plan. I’ve been doing weights twice each week and 3 days of cardio. When I do weight workouts, I have been following the BFL template as far as the order of the exercises and reps are concerned. I just can’t seem to get into the weights enough to do it 3 times a week. I have a hard time exercising at all on the weekend, but could probably motivate myself to do cardio, especially if I was going to feel satisfied with just 20 minutes. But, I never get 3 weight workouts in during the week. I have been really feeling exhausted lately, and for some reason, doing cardio when I feel like that is much more appealing than doing weights. That’s probably because I feel more energized after cardio, but after the weight workouts I feel weak and worn out. Maybe now that I’m almost done with the massive decorating project I took on I will have more energy. I’ve really been working non stop for weeks now.
I can’t wait to be done with the kitchen and family room. Read the rest of this entry »
